爱你 . 失败

已深夜了 我的猪宝贝 ♥ 才刚放工回到家... 有时真的会感觉到陪他熬夜是很累 不过身为他女友的我却还能做什么.? 帮不上忙~ 还影响到他的工作 haiz.. 失败.!! 现在呢~ 应该是要去睡了 但突然很想 blog >_<"

可能这就是新的考验吧.! 跟他在一起 比我以前走过的爱情路都不同.. 虽然他还是大学生 不过.. 也许是因为他做工的关系 [ 超忙得老师 ] 所以一切就变得不是童话里那么的美丽了 .___.'' 怎么说呢.? 事实上 他真的很少时间陪我~ 试问有那位女生不像男友多陪她和多疼她呢.? 别说跟他见面 连sms.. 都少至又少~ 不是在教书就是在开会.. 别讲陪女朋友 ♥ 陪家人也都有问题.. 还有他自己呢.? 自己睡觉的时间的只有区区那几个小时 =.=ll 哪里还忍心要求他抽出多一点时间陪我呢.? 心疼~

就当他不理不睬 [ 所谓在工作 ] 的时候~ 我好像只会烦着他 感觉上爱得好累时 : 真会反问自己 '他真的在乎和爱我的吗.?'.. ♥ 所以就心情不好 还害到我的猪工作受影响~ 真是没用.. 很多时候都自己告诉自己说要理解和体谅 ^^v 不过 没有他陪伴的时间总是过得很无奈 心情就低落.. 伤心~ 可能我知道他爱我的方式不会是童话里那么浪漫.. 不过我还是好难感觉到他真的是爱我的 也许之前我已习惯被爱是表达出来的吧.? 或者 我不敢完全相信他是真的爱我的 ♥ 因为我总怕历史从演~ 不够实在 令我很没有信心 >_<" 好怕失去..

昨天呢~ 我决定回家一个星期或几天 1来我想家.. 2. 我也很爱得好累 他的确没时间陪我 我不能怪他 .___.'' 不过在他没陪我的时间 我好难熬~ 就会不开心 >_<" 这算是自然反应gua.. 明知道他忙工作就要明白~ 真恨不得敲自己的头.. 还每次苦着脸都让我的猪担心和分心.. aikz 失败.! 要不然就去他家呆一整天.. 是好过在宿舍发霉~ 但老实说我见他家人真的多过见到他.. 有时一整天只见到他家人 而他呢.?.. 我都没见到.! 3. 我也觉得我自己有点过分 - 把他的家就当作是我的家了 :P 好是好啦.! 多一个家可以回多幸福 ♥ 不过 怎样都好~ 我不能讲没有礼貌的 =.=ll 也是时候给自己放假了.!! xDD

熬夜对我来说是很平常的事了 ^^v 等我的猪放工也算是 '顺便' 咯 hehez~ 不过是真的很想跟他多聊几句.. 就除了他午餐休息时可以陪他之外 就是要等到深夜放工后咯.! 有时还特地拿晚餐上去补习中心给他 : 只为了见他一面.!! wah~ 他真的有比首相还要忙的 :P Lolz 但现在问题出现了.!! 好怕常常sms他会影响到他工作 "只不过是想他啊~!" haiz ♥ 可怜我 连想男友时sms他也要考虑会不会打扰到他.. 然后呢~ 明知他在忙 等不到他的回信 就心情低落~ [ 真的要扁自己一下了.. 都说明知也不会明白.!! ] 而自己做什么都好 总把电话放在身旁.. 每过几秒就都望电话一下 [ 好累.. ] 但.. 无能 .____. 现在他又有'新的'竞争对手了~ 不想再影响到他 我的猪不能输给她的.! >_<" 自问 : 跟他在一起会是件坏事吗.?!

但总不能让他选我还是工作.. 他两样都不能失去 很难为的 .____.'' 所以我就要让一步 歉疚他吧.! 身为女友的 要谅解.!! T^T" wuwuwu.... 可怜 Lolz~

他很矛盾的咯~ 不要我戴面具扮开心 但又不给人家 emo... 累.! T____T"

但很高兴.!! 因为刚才我的猪宝贝一放工回来 就打给我.. 他的第一句话 '很想你啊~' ^^p 开心到.! hehez 我还 har.. 以为自己听错呢.! XP 虽然跟他谈不多 因为都累了 但挂电话之前.. 停了几秒 然后他说 '我爱你' ♥ wah~ 总算等他没白费到 hahaz.. 心很重.! 多累得我都挂上微笑 =)

多怕我回家后 他就不把我当一回事 忘了我呢~ 因为他总是将忙..

又一天啦~ 是时候该适应他爱我的方式了.! 要相信他怎样都是真的爱我的 ^^v 也尽量不影响他工作.. 要真的体谅 ♥ 爱上一位当老师的男友是将的咯~ :P blekz 心的爱 我来接受你的挑战.!! 好爱你...

糟糕的心情 好回了.!

wee... ♥ 刚回到家 不过不是我的家 是我猪宝贝的家 :P

刚才载了猪去作工后就陪他妈咪去菜市~ 很累啊.! 妈咪还买了一包 nasi lemak 给我 怕我吃不饱将 xPP 因为我算是很大吃的吧~ 连我的猪也担心下次要怎么养我 hahaz ♥ 可爱.! 其实叻 早上我已和我的猪在家吃了 两粒半生熟蛋 也喝了杯牛奶加一个面包.. 好饱哦~

11月咯.! 今天是我由此以来将早 7am 踏入学院也.. Lolx 更恐怖的是没看到什么人的. 一定很奇怪为什么我会将早起床吧~ 傻了.? 不是啦 无聊~ [ sienz 好像在自问自答 =.='' lmao ] 就一早 6.15am 我的电话就响了~ 起床冲凉.!! 因为我的猪宝贝昨天约了我要去打羽球.. 然后呢 刷好牙过后 我宝贝 ♥ 就打电话来了.. 我赶快跑过去接 怕吵醒我的 roommate ><" 不过我也没想到我的猪会将早起 hahaz.. 高兴得很.! 我还以为走到他家.. 他都还没醒来叻~ 但在电话里听他懒洋洋的声音 就预料到他会再放我飞机的啦 -___-'' 真的很想扁他咯~ 当他说 'arh~ 很想睡觉.. 等下 11am 才来找你啦..' 可恶.!! 很么垃圾哦~ 又想耍赖的.. 答应了我将多次都是垃圾.. 讨厌.! .___. 等下到 11am 他一定又说有东西忙了.. sienz 有时我真的起了疑心 ♥ - 他真的不在乎我吗.?! 心痛到... tsk tsk~

不过叻.. 幸好后来他也没放我飞机~ 乖乖起床了 =) 不然我一定会找他算账.. 把他拿来褒猪烫.!! Lolx 很伤的咯~ 一直帮他找借口说话 [ 所谓的 '体量' 嘛~ ] 然后他一直就放我飞机.. =.=" 不能了.! 再让他.. ♥ 我心就碎到不能再碎了.! 白心疼~ >_<" 过后没到几分钟 他就说他出门了~ wah.! 我吹头发吹到一半.. 都不知到他有没有 刷牙的 xP 将快.. 跟他在一起 要不心碎 ♥ 就是心脏病.! Lolx.. 我很快的走到学院后门 喘死我了.. ><' 幸好我还会有 short cut.. 不过他还叫我用跑的 wth.... 晕.!!

之后我门回到家都要8点了~ 我宝贝要上班了.. 看.! 是不是又骗我 ><" 说要打羽球 但他有来到陪我走到他家 算没放我飞机 gua.. xP 我的人就将好 将容易满足 haiz.. 但一见到他 我就有一股说不出的开心 ♥ ^_^" 多不爽他的 都抛到九霄云外了.. 那时我跟他隔开了一条马路 看到他刚睡醒的样子 可爱~ hehez

不过说到不爽的事 就要从'从前' 讲起吧 因为都很少有机会 online blog.. :

时间倒流 xD

其实之前的前几天起 我心情就很糟糕.! ♥ 心很重的.. 狠心疼~ 都是那猪老板啦 - 何猪头.!! 都说是3天休息还要去什么云顶 "学习".! 无聊... 做超级老师每个月才有3天休息.. 我都盼望月尾快到 那我的猪可以多点陪我~ 不过何猪头 竟然3天也不放过.. =.=' 我宝贝 每天开会到深夜都没有时间休息了 呆在家里陪家人的时间更少.!! 害我的猪 生病 .___. 连妈咪也常罗嗦~ 我知道不能怪业 是何猪头 不会为别人想下.. 真的 sienz.. 要人陪他疯癫 过分.! 有点想投诉.. tsk tsk~

气在我的猪 ♥ 说好本来要到我家一趟的 不过要上云顶的关系.. 其实都不知道该气呢.? 伤心好 或简单一点来讲是心疼咯~ 他说他得上云顶 因为上次他没去 sunway lagoon.. 所以他换去星期日一早下来载我去跟家人碰面的等他下到来应该是下午了吧~ 虽然哥哥出外国有车用 但他还是会累的.. 担心他会累坏.! 加上他3天假期也出了两天.. 呆在家的时间都没有了 妈妈一定不高兴.. ><" 不过我又很想他赴约 很矛盾.. 所以我一直问他 '你将很累的.. 你真的要赶下来吗.? 你连休息的时间都没有.. 在家休息吧~' 它总给我一个答案 '我要去.!' ^_^" 听到他将坚持 我开心得不得了.. ♥ 所以很烦的不断问了又问 很想知道他能坚持多久.. 因为他的坚持让要去让我感到傻傻说不出的开心.. 不过 这一切只是暂时性的 =.='

星期五过了~ 星期六那天 我原本想当睡美人一整天 要时间快快过.. 不过甜甜的信息让电话不断地响 ^_^' 结果醒来了.. 抬头望了望 隔壁那张床.. 心想 : 嗨~ roommate 又回家了.! 自己一个人多无聊.. 我宝贝呢.? 就在云顶开心的玩着~ 我却呆呆的无所事事 .____. 想信息或打电话给我的猪~ 不过他忙着玩呢 ♥ 又怕打扰到他 wor.! 感觉上越来越不爽.!! [ 何猪头啦~ 抢走了我的宝贝 ] 二来.. 原本我就很想跟他上云顶玩的 但上不成 =.=' sienz 现在反而那何柱头一说要上就 一定要去.. 什么垃圾哦 -.-' 那天我真的有想过要上云顶的咯~ 不过猪又不给 所以乖乖没上了.. sienz.! 下吃我就自己上 hmp~ 就将闷闷躺在床把整本故事书看完.. 然后 心情越来越糟糕.! ♥ 加上最近好像一直有不好的预感 又一个人.. wah 恐怖.! 开始想宝贝和家.. 宝贝在玩 不理他了~ 那就回家吧.!! 我就下定了决心 冲了凉后就回家 不想想太多.. 那时已经是傍晚了咯 ><" 很想离开这寂寞宿舍.! 我最讨厌 '闷' 字~ 超可怕 -____-'' 就算多几个小时就星期日了 但我再也呆不下去...

过后 我没通家人之下就搭上 lrt 回家.. 打算要到的前15分钟才叫他们来载我 ^_^' 结果一上车 '我们不喜欢惊喜的咯.! 你下要回家就早点告诉我.. 我们刚才在 midvalli 吃 pizza 吃到一半 差点要恰到喉咙了~ 也要赶过来载你.!! 如果我们去看戏了呢.? 原本我们还向上云顶的.. 还有........" 就这样给爸爸妈咪不停的念着~ 这是第一次给他们念 我还听得进去的还将开心.. 因为我觉得给他们念也值得 怎样都好 我已经跟家人在一起 - 开心 ♥ ^_^" 不过 糟糕的是~ 隔天一早 5点多就要起来 陪太子也爷去中华独中考试.. 虽然那短短的的几小时在家 能回到家.. 我也满足了.! xD 总好过呆在那毫无几个人的宿舍 =.=' 至少睡觉也有妹妹弟弟陪.. 和少不了他们的笑声.!! hehez

那天不知怎么 我还是感觉上缺少了一些.. 就是我的宝贝.! ♥ 想我的猪~ 不过一想到他在云顶开心的玩着 我就火 tsk stk.!! 但其实也一在等我的宝贝开完会回我信.. 但那太多的想念 不满~ 让我到 4点多才累倒睡着了.. 结果 真的5点多6点 就给家人吵醒.. 可恶.! haiz.. 只好起来梳洗出发 =.='

来到中华独中 - 我的猪的母校.. 帅哥都没有一个 sienz 死.! 在食堂吃过早餐过后 还要在这里从 7.30am 等到 11am.! 真是垃圾~ 3个小时半也.. 开玩笑 我真得发霉了咯.!! 打给我宝贝 ♥ 他还在睡觉 =.=' grr.... 荡来荡去 时间就将过 -.-' 我的青春啊.! 白流.. 之后呢.? 一直打瞌睡的我得跟我家人到 midvalli 逛街... 嗨~ 我累到快要倒了 什么.?!! 还要逛街.?! 可怜 ><" 不过 我宝贝说会来找我的.. 就不要将在回宿舍先吧.! 当作去逛逛等宝贝 ♥ 也陪家人咯~

12多中午时..我的猪才刚要下山 -___-'' 就预料到 如果要他赶来也要3点多了.! 不过这时 弟弟跑来对我说 '姐.! 我买了戏票.. 看 sammy advanture~' 我就 哦一声的回答 心想 : 那戏哪里好看的 =.='' 我便问几点.? err... 4pm 到 5.30pm ♥ har.?! 什么.? 就是说 我们得在这等到6点将... 我的天啊.! 晕~ wah sienz.. 不过开心的是 时间越长~ 见到宝贝的机会越多 ^_^' 他不用赶着过来了~ 不过要逛将久 再晕.!! .___.'' 多希望快点多 3点多 可以看见宝贝.!

但 3点多时~ '我到家啦 宝贝.!' 终于~ 不过接下来的是 '但肚子不舒服..' 心疼 ♥ haiz~ 就叫他呆在家里休息吧.. 他~ 又放我飞机了 ><' 不过也不放心他一个人不舒服驾车来... 但又很想他来~ 矛盾.! 算了吧... =.=' 就知道 心又作痛.. 这~ 该怎样跟他们交待呢.? haiz..... 我只能叹气 心碎到 痛.!! 最痛是他呆在家做完 assignment 过后 不知道生什么气~ 我都还没投诉生气 他竟然透气去打机 -___-'' wah~ 我傻笑... 心痛到麻掉.!! ♥ 但在家人面前 在大庭广众 怎么掉泪.? 泪水忍着.. 辛苦 ><" 我能怎样.? 一直打电话给他.. 多希望他告诉我 我来找你吧.! 但没有... 就那晚~ 我一回到宿舍就倒 发高烧 加上心痛到 自己掉泪.. 我很矛盾 但怎样也要体谅和明白~ -.-' 爱他 我爱得好累..

最后我回到宿舍就问他... 你不来找我了吗.? 不了~ haiz... 没力了 不过所隔天早上来找我.. [ 我再也不敢抱着希望了 就'听着先吧' ] 倒.!! 睡 zZz 麻木了.! 习惯就好... 心想 : 他真的在乎我吗.? 他真的爱我.?! 值得为他付出吗.? ><' 我不想到最后 ♥ 我是受伤的那一位.. 不过 他有在云顶赢了两只恶魔给我~ 超可爱的 ^_^' 算他在云顶也有我的心啦 :P 还有一点 - 为我的宝贝光荣 哈哈.! 因为全也输给他赢不到给他女友 xP blekz.. 我宝贝真厉害.! 不过黑色 devilz 的屁股破洞了.. 要缝回去 ><'

心情七上八下的

昨天开始 我已经感觉到不舒服了

在我宝贝床赖了一整个下午~ xD

不过呢... 晚上吃了饭就得回宿舍了.!

还没回宿舍前 我到超级补习中心送晚饭给我的猪宝贝

顺便跟他说我不是很舒服 要回宿舍了

见到他 他好像爱理不理将 ♥ >_<" 心痛

可能是因为在补习中心的关系吧~

开始觉得不爱他做这份工了.. 我会不会自私了点呢.?

回到宿舍 闷闷的~ 又困

躺在床躺着看书 等我的宝贝放工

所以我的电话一直都在身旁... 一直等着我的猪来电

但可恶的是... ♥ 我又饿了.!!

便随手穿了 sweater 就走下楼去食堂买东西吃..

就等待我的食物出炉时

看见朋友 边坐下来聊天 但不久我觉得怪怪的

抬头一看... 看见 monkey 在那里等候他的晚餐...

♥ 我也看到 bear beh.! 不过我整个人顿时傻掉~

他过后还坐在我的隔俩桌.. 我的天

看着她的背影 我心七上八下.!!

回房~ 不想了...

我就继续看我的书~ 一直等我的宝贝 ♥

不过呢 越等越不舒服... 不好的预感涌到我心头来

就到 11pm 多~ 我信息我的猪 我睡了

不过我的心都睡不着 都在等的...

心情很乱.!! 算了.. 他是过去了 past tense

不过 不开心的.. 也是我的猪知道我生病 好像爱理不理将 >_<"

可能他真的没时间吧~ 或他爱我的方式不同.?

haiz... ♥ 烦.!!

不舒服的一天

刚刚帮我的猪宝贝 ♥ 放饭菜进饭格~ [ 妈妈叫的 ]

心情好回.. 但我又不想送饭给他..

不想去那猪头补习中心~ 去到 他又不会理我的

最多嘛讲两句话~ 能怎样.? aiks..

不过真的很想见到他

haiz~ 又不舒服了 >_<" 现在呢.. 就在我宝贝家咯.!

他的家 就好像变成了我另一间幸福的家

不过.. 就得麻烦阿姐大嫂和哥哥载我 xD

其实叻.. 今天我是不舒服加上心情不好

所以悄悄过来宝贝家一趟的.. 没告诉他.!

我又不想呆在宿舍一整天 很无聊

就将~ 跑到他家来 :P

本来原以为能做睡美人 但我宝贝王子吵醒我了~

我心情不好也是因为他那猪老板 - 何老师

什么嘛.! 老师每个月才有三天假期.. 他就用那三天假期 "学习"

学习听起来当然好听一点... 其实就是去玩.!!

我平时都难见到我的猪了~ 就盼望月尾 他能多一点陪我咯

但那猪头饼老师.. 突然说要上云顶 "学习" =.='

我知道不能怪我的猪~

又不是他的错.. 该体谅 ><"

算了啦... 原本还很开心等星期五 宝贝陪我回家一趟的

但他得去 "学习" 了.!

不过有一点超不爽的是 :

我上次想要跟宝贝上云顶的 但上不成

现在他跟老师们去玩... -____-!! haiz

后来 一来到他家.. 叫了他妈咪一声后

我就跑上楼到他房间去~ 就第一件事 [ 帮他折被 ]

hahaz.. xD

又帮他整理好房间..

一进到他房间 就有 '爱' ♥ 的味道 :P 什么不满 也抛到九霄云外了

很想他.!!

不过 我走起路来还会头晕的..

和想吐 >_<" 着什么怪病嘛~ 睡觉时就发烧

haiz... 一定是 日夜颠倒的关系了

有时真的觉得 我跟我宝贝的时间不合

但我都愿意配合他的时间 等他.!

搞到现在病了... T^T'

arh..! 很想我的猪宝贝... ♥

又见到他.!

Lolz... 什么垃圾嘛~

为什么学院将大 但今天上课 也竟然会见到他 =.='

真是很无聊~

每次见到他后 我的心情就很糟糕.!! 讨厌死他..

最可恶的是 他竟然对 hui ru 说他之前的都是在玩我.! wtf

真的是人渣.!

虽然很想知道他死了没.? 但我觉得他最好死远一点..

男生都将 =.='

爱就在一起 不爱就对不起

垃圾.!!

今天本来好好的~ 很听话去上课的

然后在最后一节时.. 居然给我看见那死猴子.!!

不过都 Ok 的.. 但我宝贝说 1pm 来接我

我就在学院后门等了 还蛮久的

火就开始来了 说了1pm 的嘛.~

这还好..

但一去到他家~ 是怪我心情不好就捣乱

发小姐脾气 >_<'

不过 过后我真的很 emo..

一转身就看到我的猪宝贝在跟超多女生聊天 =.='

算我妒忌心高 但最不喜欢那 ex 字.!!

什么鬼 milk 哦.?

我总有不好的预感~ 就是讨厌她

人家抄她的又怎样.? 好像 dai sai 将.~

还要我的猪宝贝跟她道歉.. 什么哦.!! 现在我宝贝哪里错哦.?

抄你的会死是吗.?

你以前不珍惜他　就算了.~

现在他是我的猪.!!

我就是不喜欢他对你低声下气...

最垃圾的就是..

她竟然在 facebook 暗示我的猪 要他叫我滚开

38 的~ 不敢写又要讲...

你以为你是谁哦.? du lan... -.-''

感觉上 我的故事好像在从演将

猪.! 你敢耍我~ 我就不会留你.. ♥

我不想有提心吊胆的爱情

不想再为任何人掉泪~ 因为我发现

我开始真的爱上了你..

一旦爱上 我的心就会很弱

我该坚强一点.! 就算有一天 猪不爱我了

♥ 我也不能让他看见我掉泪~

bloG.. i m bak.!

♥ yay i m back... love you so much bloger~

sorry been leaving 'you' so long >_<"

but wat a big mess.. aikz

feel wanna f5 n delete all my lap sap post

but then~ there r stil a part of my memory.!

so wanna continue use this blog~

hahaz.. main reason is

i very lazy open a new blog start with a blank page again :P

phew~ while.. just alot of thing happen recently..

is coming non stop wei

faint -.-' nearly cant breath [ jump sky ]

aiks.. i thinking. wats missing i m mind.? arHh..

so wer should i start.?

since this blog been abondan xP

lets thing come one by one

talk about ♥ love.?

erm.. after monkey goes

come a pig 猪宝贝 :P

lucky he stil very sayang me.. if not i sure K him

study.?

AS.. a level~ jialat liao.!!

really GG.. T____T"

i comfirm must retake and really go brush up all

if not sure die 99

others... stil okay nor

here end.! =)

♥

last post

this wil be the last post in this blog xD
LOl.. cause there r too many memory here and is time to leave all behind ^_^

while.. blog actuli is just to express out my feeling
but after read back all my post.. i feel very childish xP
or i shud say.. m i being more mature haha [ perasan sia ]

-

ytd monkey read my blog. i kinda shock
cause i long time dint write my blog dy
and i tot he wont that free come and check my post
LOl..

after that he come and sent me a msg in fb..
double shock
i always think that he wil happi i leave him and dun fan him.. xP

readin that msg at first is really make me piss of xD
not because of kena hurt [ not anymore =) ] or wat..
just very dulan kena zha tiok by him
feel very annoy~ =.='

then i wrote so bloody long msg to reply him back..
want zha tiok him GG
but after i finish typing.. i read back~

that time.. i already chill down..
and i feel... LOL.. y m i so childish.? i oso dun wan care him liao
what i stil need to mind about.? why want zha back.?
he want write wat mah wat lor (=
so i delete it.. then go sleep

cause i had let go everything..
to find be myself back.!! ^_^"

-

actually that nite.. i happy dao~ cant sleep haha
i be myself again [ yay.!! ]
2nd point is.. i knew alot pro poolz leng zaii leh.!!
they pool dam yeng xD
and yum cha with the pro plus leng zai's (=

they also got teach me pool leh.. ^_^
and ajak me outing include pool next time.!!
i found same channel dy liao..

but one thing dun like is..
they all smoke geh ><' btw they also got respect me lar..
dint smoke infront of me

i really have fun that nite.!! xD
wee.... ciao.!!

memory

last time - :

your sweet words = fill of love

now - :

your sweet words = lie + hurt

why you give me so much of "fake" love.? nicholas.!! i miss you~
loving you is really not a desire. but is really love [ why coulden you understand ] .___.
s!gh... why everything turn from love to hurt.?

stil <3 ing you in my heart..
last promise. i wil keep it til forever~


-

why

i really really love him..
yes yes.. YES.!! i really do .____.

i want love. love.!! i WANT~
T___T' desperate of care and LOVE...
wadapak

nvm.. is over SOB.!
why my love always so short and so suck .___.

say let go jek
so easy meh.? if really so easy then no need so fuk lar
death poeple head.!!



i miss u T__T'

diappear

if one day i diappear. wil u forget me.?
nope

but i never ask
if one day i disappear. wil u find me.?
T^T

y.. my heart beat race like F1 car..
NO.. is jet.! very fast~


i realise~ my heart to u wil never die
u can don't love me
but please dun wish that i can stop loving u - I CANT stop

i just wish u realise that i was by your side when i m gone now
loving u monkey

arhh.!!

aarh..!! i m going crazy dy
real crazy..

hate all this shit feeling~ -____-
sien lar
explode... no going to care

chil for days
and let it be. alone
i pun wan be alone .__.

2 in one ♥ reali wil die faster.!
foO shen~ u this hapi boi wer r u.?
i wan chat with u.. Lol =.='

blast blast ... BLAST my ears..
sei lor~
y i m so lifeless liaO

so sien.. god. r u playing me.?
i really surrender. please

whats in my mind

he really a pig.. -____-

i~ letting go and never holding back
sometimes realy want to hate him
♥ but love and hate cannot be in a same time .___.

he care me.? he wil.~ but not cause he love me
he said is just his responsibility = sympathy.?
dont want to know. i just want to appreciate

he love me.? ♥
he wil never~ cause i had try my best

played by him.?
not counted but had pass..
i just wish he had got enough for me
wat i want just a real sincere from him even being a special one
cause i had been fool enough..
very pain T___T

when he wil stop everything and lookz at me


♥ last promise.?
yes i wil keep the promise.. stupid waiting
but never letting him know

so... stil care him.?
nah.~ never.. i wil never care his stuff anymore
he kau lui his problem
his life got girls but is not me.! xD

cause i dun want hurt so dun wanna care
dun wan care so dun want to know~
=)

but as in care him not his life.?
this is diff story :D
care.. let it flow lor~ ♥

i just wil~
never letting him know ♥ 'i love him'
not caring him as he had use to it
not going to bother him until..
when i feel hurt throwing him aside

cause
if he knw i love him
his heart wil get more far away
when i care him more
is like uLu glue stick to his life. he wil hate me
but if he down
i wish i can cheer him up

cause i miss his smile than his emo pig faCe (=

i cant stop him from giving me hurt ♥

so i need to protect my heart my own
care him lesser
blind my eyes and dun want knowing the truth

he love me or not.?
rather duno than getting a NO
but i wil wait u say ♥ "yes~"


put this in my mind
"he wil never ♥ love me. dun think he wil.. never~ "
but my heart cant stop telling myself that
"i love u.. nicholas"

kesian me

Lawl.. kesian me
today is the first time i eat my lunch in such a huge college -alone-!
u know how big is tarC in setapak.?

i like someone kena dumped aside..
sob sob T____T
eat also no taste~
but hav to eat mah.. if not later gastriC
sienZ

stupid teacher sudden today say no BIO.!
yay.~ but 2 hours break..
doing nothing~
time pass like an arrow
why r.?
but one thing is true ♥ .. time heals (=

wee.. everything is like no real.?
i kinda blur haha xD
life.!! rocK it man...
enjoy to the maX.!

yay.! i m glad i had totally let go
the pain. ♥ the love - everything (=
after the nite cry all out

study study.... study.....
sigh. eXam coming. sei lor~
dun care.! must score A

gone (=

there's only once
never twiCe
gone mean gone~

no point holding
letting it go
and moving on

girl stay strong
don't look back
never tears

empty heart ♥
without love
just the pain
it had gone

heart is feel
when only u in my eyes
smile at u (=
appreciate what i left

not the love
is the heart

someone special
more than friend
less than nothing

but
the last promise ♥

after cry

after cry.. everythings change~
nothing left. heart taken back ♥
even is broken but times heal (=

i know how hard i tried to hold it. is already too late
end is end~
just let everything start over again..
now i feel much diff xD

i start to feel my heartbeat..
it race like F1 car when i miss him
yes~ i love him
but
all had start from zero after i cry million of times (=

pass memory had washed
no more thinking back
he fall from the starting point again..
wil he beyond my wall one more time.?
or
he wil just stay outside and just fren~

i had pour all my love to him out of my heart
is empty again..
never love never hope
bye memory~
i wil restore a new memory.. friend (=

i appreaciate i had love u - my lover before
but pain have to go.. dun wanna it come back
and i rmb u said u promise that wont hurt me again
i wish is true ♥

i wont miss the pass anymore
cause i dun wan fall a tears

somehow. nothing left
tired holding.. is time to let go~
let it flow..

telling u something

write on the sand. it wil washed away by sea water
but i wrote it on my heart ♥
it wil be forever there~

y telling u that i love u is so hard.?
y i have to pretend to hate u.?
cause
i scare once u know
u wil go away

u know.? i rather blind myself up
to love ♥ u forever

wil u love me is not a question mark anymore
but
but please dont tell me that u leave
cause i don wanna stop loving u


5201314 of love is not enough time to fold
but 520 ♥ of heart is pure
to u
i love u

haix. y lar love.?

sigh.~ sometimes think back..
also not nothing dy
if he treat me nothing. if i m nothing to him
he wont come A level for me
wont be by my side
and won't waste money on me T__T'
alot alot more

dunnO lar..
i just stil wanna believe he do love me .___.
lie or turth. is does not matter
cause i chose to love and not chose to accpet the truth

y love ♥ thing so complicated..
he might lies.. i can close 2 eyes.~
see hows thing go lor
sigh may be he is really not my forever

actualy just simple lar.
i wanna forget every pass thing just start a new love sincerly with him
he last time lie or dun lie
love me or not~ not important ler
if god giv a chance to start again.. i wil stil love him
how nice if his heart just got me
not his ex also -____-

sigh T__T'
y wan u to love me only so hard.?
i just wanna be with u and love u~

suan le bah~
if i just now dun so rude then he wont hurt ler
haix...

let go bah.. he not my forever ♥
even though i love him. he wont..
silent love in heart. guess is enough

lost

sorry ♥

i dun mean it

not important

everything.. is not important anymore. i dont wanna care anymore
the most i need to care is my mom. beloved mother~
sorry ♥

i wil study hard
i know i dunno how to love u
but just wanna u know

i really love u. mom

off my mind

yay.! case close.. cause i had totally let go. altot haven recover but most important i had know the truth.~
is proven. no need explaination.. finally i know all today
answer simple. i m just totally nothing to him before. never ever once~ sumtimes i wonder he got reali love me before anot. but now. i dun wanna know cause is not important.
lies bring excuse. excuse cover lies (=

i realy wanna thank his ex. if she dun tell me all. i stil blur ing. although is deep cut thru my heart but lucky had end n__n'
what she say r proven.! i really feel wanna post it on wat she tells me. but i feel i dun need be so bad lar.. LOLx.
he.. at the beginning dun even love me at all.. y guys always thinks girls r stupid.? he dunno his ex wil tell me everything dy meh.? i feel i reali stupid lor. trust him.?! no way~
may be as a friend is ok lar. love.? ♥ dint think about that. be his fren is fine. lover is danger xP

first come a malay girl say wanna walk to the end with her
2nd is a girl he say he stil got feeling on her and stil love her
3rd.. me lor -____- s in nothing

i always prove myself is wrong. he is loyal.. think back reali feel wanna vomit blood~
i dun have spy dy meh.? i dun wan spy only mah cause a word trust. though wanna close one eyes. he love me then others i dont mind nor.~ wan check the truth easy only mah.. i realy dunno why i wil love him.. so wrong
love a person that just playing me.. real stupid right.?

when he wanna chase back his ex then say he hate his current gf.. infront of his gf then say he love her. surrender wei~
but truth oso geh. is i 一厢情愿 lor.. one way love

actuali he also not that bad is he change but sigh.~ but i feel he real 无药可救 dy
i hate excuse and lies. is not explaination.! i dun wan to know~ no wonder people say duno beta than know.
i feel so played~ a sentance can come out from his msg and everyone know. just i dunno.. the sentance is some sort of "couple with ying.? no way.. know wont together with her dy lar. end up pun break" wahsai.. then i wat.? toy.?!
yea lar i know lar.. i just nothing to him from the beginning. he just love her from the beginning til now. me wat.? LOLx
he dint ask me for couple before.. i somtimes reali wonder.. are we realy a couple before.?
haha reali funny.~

lucky i had wake up.! i think i treat people too good dy xD LOL. time to care people less and care ownself more ♥
dun care wat people think. enjoy to the max.! but then i earn somthing. see through your real u.. time to brush up my studies. dam suck.! tutorial.. oh gosh.~ alot sia - faint.! =___='

wrong means wrong.! excuse just lie ing yourself not other. fire always cannot cover the paper~ enough from him.
i realy dun mind single forever.. not cause him. is cause i dun nid it (=

god.! i had been cheated alot times. enough lar~ LOLx if u continue give me all those pig guy. i kung fu u ar xD

back penang suck

i m telling u that i maggie me here.! wtf~ -________-
lifeless
u know penang is a food heaven.?
nice food every where but i eat what.? maggie mee.!! WTH

pain gone. whats next.?

now i m souless - totally empty
i duno what stil left 'nothing'.~

he love me or not is no longer a question mark
is already not important to me anymore ♥

love please leave me alone

turn baCk

sometimes i realy dnt understand. love ♥ suck or i suck
why he just counlden let go the pass - her to love me~ or from beginning til now. i m just nothing to him.?
stil.. there is alot of question mark..
sometimes people say is better dun know the answer
may be is true. sigh .. y is nicholas.? y is him

some people ask y him. cause - i put my hand infront of my heart ♥ is lost.. is him mean him. cause i love
god~ i wan hurt pain killer.!

and love ♥ exit in my life
i just wan to be myself back - happi girl. y love exist take away myself.?

question markZ

i m totally heart broken.. is totally.!
sigh~ til now is so dam pain ♥ i had lost of emotion like death person. only know how to tears. i duno why i m stil crying..

today 6th june wakie up already afternoon about 12pm cause i sleep very early about 6am morning.!! Lolx. telling that if i m not totally cry ♥ until tired then i wont be sleeping. my eyes now is like gold fish~ might worst than that

well.. hapi burfday 22th wai kin gor (=
his burfday. badly that yesterday 1am sumthing after call him and wish him then start to say my sad story. so kelian him~ birthday also wanna hear i cry on phone. hear my sad story all those but reali thankZ that he alteast listen to me. if i cant find some one to tell. i reali wil explode~ ♥ and he also comfort me plus lame joke.. C= although is stil pain but atleast i can shortly forget. just a moment but.. is enough~

talk talk... talk everything until 6am sumthing. of cause is he calls me if not i bankrupt lu xD for talking on phone for 5 hours plus.! sigh.. sumtime wat i listen from other might be correct also. actually i got alot things to tell nicholas but i just dun dare to open my mouth or type it out. may be the process is not important~ the important is the result..

this morning 8am sumthing then wake by my pig parents.. oh faint.~ they just love last min. tell me that they wanna back penang. my hometown cause my daddy 'another dad' die -__- sigh. i duno i should hapi or sad. hapi that i get to bac penang. i reali miss my hometown like craZy and my cousin sis. while sad cause someone die sigh.~

i feel i reali lifeless now. i guess since yesterday my emotion is terrible until my dad bring me sit in sushi kiing. i also dint order anything to eat. i m real hungry but i just hav no appetite. i know i m going to hav bad gastric soon but wat to do.? i just... dun feel putting things in my mouth ._.
and also~ i hurt my leg just now. it reali bleed.. but i feel nothing at all.! no pain.. nothing~ Lolx sei lor. then i go wash my leg so that water make me feel pain. but stil~ no feeling.! reali no. it bleed alot but i just let it be until it stop itself. i know. i realise.. heartache is much more pain than real physical injured. i real~ wan die..

wake infront of mirror.. oh gosh.! ♥ is like a dam sick people. pile while. no emotion. no energry.. sigh. izit world is going to end.? or what...

dear. actuali i got alot things to tell u. to ask u but the answer i always get is the same. u just told me to remember that u love ♥ me. u know~ dunu since when i cant feel your heart and your love to me anymore. no because u don't prove. is a feeling. last time u dint do anything but i can feel but now.. is nothing.?

u said 'a gurl had found his dream one but not mean the guy had found his dream one' izit mean that i m not his dream one.? telling me indirectly or giving me hint. i wana ask but answer wil be the same also.. i know~ i know some people give me comment. what shit say he just playing me. but i stil dun trust them.. well someone say he take me as spare means 候补.. like he is finding another beta girl but keeping me as backup so atleast he got someone to love or some sort ♥ of that. sigh.~ i think that before. he do reali love me may be.. but i just not his forever.?

last time i promise myself just wil love a person once. i wil not love a person twice cause first time leave. the possibility for him to leave 2nd time and to hurt 2nd time is there~ i need protect myself. sometime i stop myself from thinking too alot and rubbish but to protect myself.. i have to think. the plan. if not it wil last forever lyk this. i know he wont leave me. as wat other said that he take me as backup.~ actuali i dont mine. ♥ i really love him but just pain is myself.. i wish he could tell me that if i m really not the one he wanted to love then i wil get the answer.

now. he love me or not is not important anymore. not i don trust but i betraying my heart. my feeling.. see can see wrong. tel can tell lie but feeling wil never wrong~ rite.? i feel there is not such thing as perfect love. love road like wave.. got sad. got happi got sweet and bitter~ y sweet that time he treat me like gold but bitter that time. he quit.?

i m not 3 years old kid and i m not first day knowing him. but i guess he don know me well. actuali i reali understand but he dint try to understand wat i mean.. i duno y everything end up sure his is the one correct and i m the one say sorry.? like last time he call his ex and tell her that he miss her voice.. i reali hurt~ i was asking myself. got any girl can accept a bf telling another girl that he miss her voice.? i also close one eyes but end up he said miss the pass wil do. is normal.. and said i miss my ex too. but miss in heart or flash back i understand but to tell the person 'i miss....' i different story. ♥ end up he emo and sad. then i m the one say sorry.. then is he rite or wrong.? actuali i dint might. i closing one eyes. i just wan take it as my fault so.. said sorry.~ i dun wan argue or wat... is pain but i stil can take it

then next case is his friend shout that i m his 'pet sister'. mean he tell him that i m his pet sis infront of his fren.. then he said is because his fren feel my fb picture dun look like me. so he joke that is pet sis. ya~ i know he love talk nonsen and lame joke. i dun mind but this can joke de.? is... hurt. end up he said he just being himself and joke crap around. so conclusion my fault again saying sorry cause i mind wat his fren said ._. but telling i m his gf so hard meh.? he say is obvious. blind oso know that we r couple but he also no nid say that hurt stuff.. but nvm lar. i close one eyes again. i say sorry.

i feel... i girl normal reaction right. but i guess i m reali doing wrong and stupid thing infront of his fren such as merajuk all that so i giving him stress. this i can understand.. just because i duno how to b a girlfriend..

i feel wanna ask him alot alot of things wan wanna tell him how i feel.. i want to sit with him and talk with him.. ya i know if we do that. it might lead to 'end'.. so we should to not tell each other feeling.? he is a smart guy and i m not stupid also. we cant lie each other cause we r not love blind.. but i rather blind myself then being smart cause i dun want to know u r hurting me or u not real love me.~ ♥

something i hold back. i dint want to ask and dint wan to know. may be the answer is not more important than our relationship. example if he lie. i rather trust his lie than telling him that he is lie ing and relation get worst. there is just 2 ways. either sit down tell everything out. but prepare that the relationship wil get worst. we 2 wil explode and wil 'end'.. or 2nd choice is eventhough i feel is hurt or is not real. i stil wanna try to giv a chance to continue. dun care watever backup or nonsen. just wish i can touch his heart one day. i can just accept anything to be with him. or til one day he say 'i dont love u' then i wil walk away but i wil stil love u.. ♥

is just like coffe. i know what u mean. when the first time i drink the coffee that u give. with with sugar and milk. but til one day he realise let me drink add sugar milk dy coffee is not pure enough so.. u giv me drink an original bitter coffe without telling me. u want me taste out and wanna see my reaction but he does not know that before i drink that bitter coffee. i really know that is a bitter one. i see through the coffe colour.. but stil.. i drink.~ then i give him the reation is not hapi. telling him is bitter. i cant feel that coffe last time anymore. is sumthing missing.. then he tol me the truth that he giv me drink original coffee. not sugar not milk. so i dun lik.? no.. he dun know that actuali is not because the sugar and the milk adding problem.. when i see the colour. i feel diff. i ask my fren. why the coffee change.? my fren tol me - is not the coffee change. he dint change. he just let u see the original and pure him. u just starting to know him.

but he dont know that the feeling is.. i cant feel a special feeling. the love.. last time he give me drink the coffe with sugar and milk. may be he put too many so it always sweet. i cant feel the bitter. but he dun know one thing that i can smell.. he coffee smell. the taste even is sweet might cover the original bitter but he dunnu that i actuali loving to drink the one that he made. not because is sweet.. 2nd time he let me drink original coffe that time. i feel sumthing lost.. i cant feel that is he made the coffee.. i dun mind is bitter. i sad not because is bitter. i sad cause after he remove the sweet~ i know realise that that coffee is not he made. 不是他泡的咖啡~ i wan tell him that even u add sugar and milk in the 2nd cup. i also wil feel missing the.. love 真诚 ♥ in it. is not the sweet problem. i cause say that he dint made the coffe cause i dint see with my eyes. he might be made himself but with 3 in one pack. not real from coffee bean. diff way of love.. he tell me is he made. he got the love but he might stil dun understand. i dun mind drink bitter coffee. if u made d. how bitter wil stil sweet.

i duno i should trust my feeling or him. may be drink coffee can drink wrong but trust him even though is wrong. i dun wan be right.. loving him is no wrong no rite. i just wana he know wat i mean. 'i dun wan war for peace. i wanna peace so no war.' dear i reali love u~ even u tell me u dun love me. i might cry like death person. hurt me like crazy but i dun wan drag to hell.. i wil be myself~ i hope one day the result is u hold my hand back walk with u foever down the road.. i love u who u r. i know the coffee original is bitter but nid time to 适应 rite.? if letting me choose. i rather chose the bitter coffee that u made then drinking a sweet coffe without knowing u made or others.? may be is u made but it mis with sweet.. confuse with real u

sigh.~ i feel wanna hug u wan telling u dun leave but to make things beta. u say wanna rest~ en. but i oso wan u to rmb. my love to u is always truth and pure ♥

love til never fade away

after cryZ and everything
i stil wanna tell you that 'i love ♥ u'
loving u silently~

and i wil make u love me more
of being myself (=

i really miss you dear
summore your hp die T_T'

and thankZ dear that u stil by my side
seriously loving ♥ u deeply

u r special that y i love
i love who u r~

and i miss your smile (=
cause your smile can melt my heart ♥
not act or fake smile.
is the one real from your deep heart

hug~ u promise me that u wil never leave
then i wil promise u that i wil ♥ love u forever (=

bao bei..
i wish to be with you happily forever
and hold your ♥ heart back~

everything is on my own now

his msg :
you know dear.. i cant hav u cause when i do.. you wun fell happy. its like sad for watever i do for being myself.. y not just dun hav you but love you. just not having someone. may be is not the right time.. but love, never hav a time to love cause its always loving someone.

but u dont know that without u is without soul and heart ♥
i dun know how to express myself anymore.. i just wanna to love u


he said :
♥ what there is there... its just there. y not just leave it.? some things u can have. somethings u can touch but somethings, when u touch.. it fade.. somethings when u have.. it dissappear. y not just admire and look at it

but dear. u dont know that - sigh.. i just duno how to explain


he said :
1 person's fall is another men's rise... 1 mistake is not another men's gain, is your own gain, cuz mistake are 2 be learnt from... "if the door does not open. dun budge thru it. dun force. y not just ring the door bell.? if its open then smile.. if it does not. then smile either.. just... differently"


i surrender..but 'xien ying.. u cant cry.! stay strong~'

well he just change his facebook relationship status
another knife straight throw my heart ♥ again
3 month 16 days

now i understand.. but is late.
actuali from the beginning til now. he also not counted as my bf
he dint reali ask me before~
even he lies me. i wil stil trust him that he wont lie me
or eventhough if he is playing me. is worth cause

i reali love ♥ him
stupid rite.?

i wish i can stop crying





and y he stil can so hapi.?

suck feeling

nightmare.. nit3mare again.!

y.? i got same feeling again

let me list out~

emo - some sort of no mood
no appetite to eat
no energy
tears T-T'
heartbreak

i drop in a dark hold again~ where should i walk
which direction i should go.? i wanna cry

stand stil~ kieZ chill.. girl stay strong
dun tears.! T_T' dun~
y..

is the exactly the same feeling after my prevoius ex leave me
the 'negative graph' time..
i.. so hard to get over a 'him'
now come a he T-T'
sigh.. i really heartlesZ ler..
if i say not pain then is reali fake

last time atleast got someone to bring me up
now.. no.! is alone T-T'
xien ying. u have to stay strong~ must
dun cry..

y i keep fail in love.? ♥
is there any 'love dummer' books.? ahr...
even there is.. but is not like movie can take 2
once.. only once.! no turning back

i though once is enough~
here comes the twiCe. faint
wil it be 3rd~ oh.......... no
i really ___ can i die.?

last time take me about half year to recover
but now this case.. i ♥ love him more than previous
so means ..
more than one year.? what the -___-

i m really dehydrated
tear. cryZ .. hey.! normal reaction kay.? =.='
but 'stay strong girlz' sob

y.. y i so stupid
only know how to make endless trouble
make ppl stress.. do dumb thing
so useless~
love a person oso 没能力

altot things had settle~ beta ending than previous
but stil
having the same result..

may be after we walked all the way long
he just realise that he can't wear the shoe~ i not suit him.?
i feel 辛苦

how to love ♥ him.? how.?
he hide his feeling cause scare hurt me
but i duno i was wrong

he last time not himself. then change to himself
i need try to 适应 2 diff thing. need time right.?
now.? change to..... i dunno
i really tired~ worth loving ♥ him.?

actually y so complicated.? i just wanna to love him
him.! watever him~
but.. why so hard.? be with a lover like so imposible to me

sigh.. i wanna be soulless and heartlesZ dy ♥
no smile. be evil devil
stay strong.!
cant let anyone see that i m weak
stay alone~
so no one wil hurt me again.! no one..

be like 奸人坚 so nice
or wat.? erm... 麦提爽 Lolx -__-
i cant lose.! i cant let people see the real me~
stay strong..

coffee is bitter then is bitter
eventhough u put how many sugar or milk
the coffee bean is stil bitter
but why it love ♥ by people.?

after pain is love again

a couple must be lover but lover not must be a couple
letting it flow~

love river

it just really like a circle
which had made a full turn
now had reach the original point again
in love ♥ it will never end
the love still there just the way
so meaningful

i started to learn to love
to be more understandable~

thankZ dear
he give me an answer that i wanted to know long time
the reason he - ming sung leaves me

now be myself. enjoy everything to the max
and i promise that i will find my love ♥ back one day
the day that u will hold my hand again~

things wil change
but my love ♥ to u wil never change
4ever heart

dear nicholas.. i love u ♥

love in rain

(｡･ω･｡) ♥ (｡･ω･｡)

us


love in rain
after the tears.. bright again

the rain

when i saw the word 'end' and it link to 'rest' from your msg
my tears falls like waterfall. cry likes world going to end
no.! dun go.. i wanna be with u

i realise how deep i love u and i cant live without u
feel pain in ♥ love cause duno the truth
but
everything might be lost after knowing
stil... ♥ loving

be yourself dear and i wil jump to your world~
i wanna know u - the real you
plus being myself also and to love u at the same time



i want to say
realy sorry.. for saying 'hate u'. i swear and i swear again that i dont mean it
hug~ i ♥ vy u till forever
and i realy miss u. 2 week T_T' ( A Level holidays )



i realy do love u deep
♥ nicholas ng eng hoe


after rain~
things stil wil change.. it wont like before but hope it wil not worst
want wil be better instate.! ♥

next is jodi leaving.! no. my best roomate ever xD
she also my pharmacy Lolx
11th june is her last day in hostel
wil and must back to say bubbye T_T'
and huan jin :P

sweet coffee

甜甜的一杯香浓咖啡

老公..
无论你泡的咖啡有多苦
只要是你泡的
都是甜的 ♥


我爱你

本来只是一杯谈谈的咖啡约会

变成了
谈谈累积的喜欢 - 爱

love ♥ love

喜欢是谈谈的爱
爱是深深的喜欢


爱 + 爱 = 真诚的爱
爱 - 爱 = 无私的爱
爱 x 爱 = 无限的爱
爱 / 爱 = 唯一的爱

♥ 爱你

autumm goodbye

..autumn goodbye

i never promise u wil happy ending ♥
you never said u wouldn't make my cry
but summer ♥ love wil keep us warm long after
our autumn goodbye. autumn goodbye~

thinking of you and the love of our live
in the sweet summer times
so sad but true
we must leave it behind in our hearts. in our mind
from april through september
bitter sweet was the love that we share
don't forget.. i remember

memorise cant fade
but my heart has a place for the smile on your face
and may be some day
we can be more then friend
love wil find us again
red leaves and blue 2mr
time wil give back the love that
we shared on the time that we borrowed

i never promise u wil happy ending ♥
you never said u wouldn't make my cry
but summer ♥ love wil keep us warm long after
our autumn goodbye. autumn goodbye~

dear~

i never promise u wil happy ending ♥
you never said u wouldn't make my cry

i love this songs.. " tears T_T "
why i could tears alot for a guy cause of loving so much
dunno why this few days continuously so depress and down
keep on my music as loud as possible
to blast the whole day long

i guess i m going craZy
wonder if this continue~
shud i ask for " autumn goodbye ".? ._.
may be " love wil find us again "
but... i reali love u hubby~

wil u hold me back when i say goodbye.?
i wish i m under heavy rain everytime so u wont realise i cry ♥

i don't want to loose u.!
but if i hav to~ i will stil love u til forever





dear~ i wanna be with u ♥ forever